Finding Positivity In Griefa
My father was a very complex, genuine, charismatic, and determined individual who loved to challenge the way we think about things and was constantly studying, reading, and living a lifestyle to increase health & wellness. He loved to be able to defy the odds and when he was dead set on something, he always accomplished his goals.
My Dad was just about everything, except the “typical” Dad.
- He was a successful mortgage broker and owned his own mortgage company.
- He was HEAD OVER HEELS in love with my mother, in fact, he married her twice.
- He was a record setting power lifter in the bench press, lifting over 600 pounds while weighing only 189 pounds.
- He went back to school at 40 to become a doctor, when he passed, he was Dr. Calvin Murphy McDuffie III.
- He was a devout Christian, who despite reading the bible multiple times, continued to read it daily until the day of his death.
- He was always the life of the party and compassionate towards others.
- He supported his children’s endeavors and taught us about the importance of Christianity, respecting ALL people, and if you work hard you can achieve anything, and most importantly to smile and enjoy life.
His favorite drink was Crown Royal, favorite song changed by the day, favorite child is my sister Capri (lol), favorite person was my Mom, favorite show was Preacher, favorite food, Sushi, favorite book was the Bible, favorite cologne, Cool Water, favorite team was the Detroit Lions, etc. etc.
He was my best friend.
Icovered my own battles with addiction, in articles like Online Therapy and How Addiction Turned Me Into The Best Damn Wellness Coach. I understand the affect alcohol and other drugs can have on one’s mind and body.
My father was one of many in my family to inherit the “addictive” gene and years of alcoholism led him to battle diabetes, pancreatitis, high blood pressure, and kidney disease.
My father wasn’t a “mean drunk” or how an alcoholic is often portrayed in the movies. In fact, he was quite the opposite. When he drank he loved singing, laughing, and seemed more intent on making sure everyone else was having a good time. I’ve never seen him falling over, get behind the wheel, or miss work due to alcohol.
Some where along the line, when I was growing up, my father’s alcoholism led to poor choices that resulted in my parents divorce. This led to my dad dealing with severe depression and anxiety. The signs of alcoholism seemed magnified. Despite the divorce, he and my mother remained close friends and spoke daily.
He began suffering from pancreatitis, diabetes, and other internal health problems. It was extremely hard for me to understand that my dad was sick, I thought he was just depressed and missed the love of his life, my mother.
My dad was only 5’6 but over 200 pounds with almost no body fat, always had a smiling baby face, the IQ of Einstein, and the ability to make anyone smile. He didn’t look or act sick.
But he was…..Extremely.
Mydad and I shared our opinion on his greatest accomplishment, he stopped drinking, began dating my mom, and they re-married. My dad was intent to discover the psychology behind addiction and mental illness. Though he was an extremely successful entrepreneur, he decided to go back to school and study psychology.
After earning his bachelors, masters, he went on to achieve a doctorate in psychology. He wanted to make a difference.
While my Dad was physically built like a professional wrestler or star athlete, it was actually my Mother who was the tough one.
For him to get her back, he faced his demons and stopped drinking.
Unfortunately for us, by this time, the damage had been done and he already had severe health issues.
Guide Your Health
Mywife Lacey and I work at a rehabilitation and wellness facility and founded Guide Your Health in January 2018. My father was instrumental in the way we developed the site, contributed to such articles asHGH Benefits and Side Effects, The Best Cleanse For Weight Loss and Belly Fat, Using Maca Root To Lower Cortisol Levels, and pushed me to keep pursuing my dream.
My Dad and I talked often about writing an eBook together, the importance of supplements likeblack seed oil for the immune system, probiotics for gut health, the repairing powers of enzymes like serrapeptase, and how counting calories was inefficientbecause it restricted nutrition.
Grieving Changes Directions
Ihave been having an extremely difficult time grieving the loss of my father. Sometimes I am sad, sometimes angry, sometimes I feel hopeless but I want to be able to do something to honor my father’s legacy.
Guide Your Health mainly consists of a healthy living blog, an online supplement store, and online coaching programs in weight management, natural pain relief products like kratom powder, natural anxiety relief, and alternatives to prescription drugs like Adderall by taking nootropics.
While I will be continuing these programs, I have a new focus. Like my father, I want to do more.
I want to continue to use my platform to help others to improve their life.While I continue to find joy in the programs we offer and reviewing the best supplements on the market, I want to do more.
I want to help people to reverse disease through alternative medicine. Many people have been able to beat cancer, diabetes, kidney disease and more through proper supplements and healthy dieting.
I am passionate about this and I know it would make my father proud. Sometimes in grief, it can help us to want to do more in life.